Night of the Lepus....uh, Killer Bunny

There are many things I enjoy in life.  Long walks on the beach (or anywhere for that matter) with my beaugtiful wife, deep-fried cinnamon rolls the size of your head, the laughter of my children, The Princess Bride (and Star Trek, Star Wars, The Big Bang Theory) and Monty Python.  That being said, it will come as no surprise to those of you who know me that I recently had a Monty Python day of sorts.

I have now been in the process of gathering bicycles and restoring them in order to sell and give all of the proceeds to Sunrise Day Camp.  I call this project ReCycle for Sunrise and its the latest fundraising effort of Connor's Army.  As much as my beautiful wife Amy likes to take romantic walks on the beach with me, she's not too keen on my riding across the country again anytime soon.  So I've been converting my corner of the basement (meine kleine mannhöhle) into my bike repair workshop so I can fix the bicycles that have been so graciously donated to our cause.  Some I find on the road and others have been given to me by friends or family (thanks be to Joan!).  In working on them I often find myself feeling a bit like F.G. Superman in the sketch below;



Of course, I don't always change clothing before I get to work but you get the idea.  I've lost track of how many bicycles I've sold in the last two years (the project really started before the Ride Across America) but I know we've made over $2,000 from the sale of these bicycles alone.  I don't sell them for very much, basically for about half of what a comparable bike would go for on Craig's List.  I clean them all up, lube them up, replace any parts that need to be replaced, and true the wheels if they need to be trued.  I then look for a comparable bike and then print out a sign and place it on my front lawn here on Main Street in Northport during the weekends.  I've even had people come by and say they've heard about me and were wondering if I had a particular type of bike.  Word of mouth can be a powerful marketing tool I guess.

But aside from Bicycle Repairman, there is another connection I had last Sunday with my Monty Python side.  To really understand this Pythonesque moment, I need to give you a little background.   Way back in the day, although not completely "old school"(which from the graphic below you can see is a bit behind the front haunches but not all the way to the mid spine), I had a summer job with my friend Ed Trevorrow.

 

We worked for the German Civil Corps of Engineers which was attached to the military base at Katterbach, Germany.  Our summer job was basically to cut all the grass in the area below;

 

 

It really wasn't such a bad gig since we had self-propelled mowers for most of the work (every now and then we had to use sling blades) and for the first part of the summer we got to ride behind them on these trailer seats until someone decided it was too dangerous for fifteen-year-old kids to be doing that and they took them away.  It was also funny as hell because the four of us would show up about 8:00 every morning but we would never roll out until 8:30.  It would always take us 30 minutes to get there and then our German supervisor would have to take a break at 10:00 which would last half an hour.  We would work until 12:00 and then head back for lunch which would take an hour.  It would then take us about half an hour to get back to wherever we had left off.  We'd work until about 2:30 when he would have another half hour break and then finish up about 4:00.  It wasn't until half way through that we learned these "breaks" basically consisted of all the civil service employees meeting back at the garage to drink a beer or two.  I guess civil service can be the same everywhere.

 

So it was usually up to me, Ed and the other two summer hires to do most of the grass cutting.  One day while out cutting grass we came across a couple of baby rabbits.  Now, we were curious as any teenage boy might be and we wanted to gete a closer look.  Big mistake!!!!!  As we edged closer to get a look at the "herd" (yes, that is actually the technical term for a group of rabbits) big mama bunny decided we were a threat and came right at us.  Did you know they make a hissing sound when threatened?  And they do have a crazed look in their eye when they attack.  Now this was probably the summer of 1979 but since I had been in Germany since 1976 (and Augusta, GA before that) I had not really seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  It wasn't until years later that I saw the movie and realized that the "killer rabbit" was probably just a mama bunny protecting her young ones;

  

Of course, blasting it to bejeezus with the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch was probably a bit extreme.  This experience left a lasting impression of me and I've always equated the most protective act of a mother for her children with this mother rabbit's actions.  Needless to say we backed off and went to cut another section of the field.

This event also tied into another childhood memory of mine.  When my father was stationed at Fort Ord, CA we used to go to the drive-in movies quite a bit, to the UA Marina Auto Movie in Monterrey as a matter of fact.  It used to be something we did almost once a month and I remember seeing quite a few movies there.  I remember The Black Scorpion, The Blob and one that stuck with me for years, The Night of the Lepus.  What's that you ask?  Well, here's the trailer;



Go ahead.  I can feel your shudders of terror out there in cyber space.  But hey, for a seven-year-old it was pretty scary exciting stuff.  I had a great time but I have to admit it was a long time before I would touch a bunny.  And Easter would just freak me out.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't suffer from Leporiphobia I just happen to have a healthy respect for what these animals are capable of doing if you get them riled.  Which brings me to Sunday night.

It had been a wonderful day playing with the kids and enjoying National Ice Cream day.  We had home made pancakes and vanilla ice cream for breakfast.  We went to Baskin-Robbins for lunch and for dinner we had ice cream sundaes.  A little before dinner we noticed we had a rabbit in out back yard.  Now we had noticed this rabbit about a few times in the past but hadn't thought anything of it but this time the rabbit stayed and even came up fairly close to the kids.  It was a bit brazen in fact.  When it came time to move the bicycles off the front lawn and into the shed the rabbit didn't hop off like one would think.  No, it decided to lie down under the swing set and take a little siesta while I moved the bikes around not ten feet away from it.  The kids thought this was all fantabulous and we even got a few great pictures of our bunny pal.  Here he is placidly planning his next foray;

 

And here he is making an incursion into enemy lines to test the preparedness of our defenses;



 

 

Ultimately the entire family was delighted by our new lagomorphian friend.  He stuck around for quite some time and then moved to the front yard when the real fun began.  You see, I didn't want to scare him off but I did need to take out the garbage and move the car to the drive way.  But I was convinced he (or perhaps she?) would run off as soon as I got onto the walk.  So I kept checking every fifteen minutes or so which amused my wife to no end.  She started teasing me that I was afraid of the bunny.  Of course I reminded her of the killer lagomorph of Pythonian fame which only served to amuse her more.  But I didnt' want to scare the bunny!  I was enjoying the fact that we have a wild animal that is so at ease in our yard and I don't want to scare it off.  Of course the glint in its eye didn't help;

Beatrix Potter my henie, that thing is mocking us!

In any event I finally had to give in and move the garbage out to the curb and move the car to the drive way.  The bunny did move to the other side of the front yard but it did stay in the yard.  I guess it's not afraid of me lobbing the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch at it.  I'm just glad it didn't morph into this Pooka;

 

Now that one I may need to lob a grenade at, or maybe just pummel with a baseball bat.  It's enough to give you leporiphobia.  Of course, it would all be easier if like Raj, I were the King of the Rabbits;

 

 

 

Stay well my friends and I'll see you on the road!

Relative is as Relative Does

I have had a long association with the movie Forrest Gump.  When it first came out I think I saw it three times.  Then way back when Amy and I were "single" (which is what we call the period before we had children) we used to go away for our yearly "honeymoon" which basically meant we would take a brief vacation with just the two of us  to celebrate our anniversary.  On our second "honeymoon" - well, technically the third since Ireland was the first and Cape May was the second - we travelled to Savannah, GA to exhilerate in the Old South charm of the city that provided us settings for Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil and JFK among so many others.  Also the birthplace of Johnny Mercer of "Moon River" fame.  And since I had in the not so distant past performed for nine months with Andy Williams in the "Moon River Theatre" it was pretty cool to make that connection.

But the connection we really had to make was sitting on the bench in the spot where they filmed the bench scenes for Forrest Gump.  I'm sorry to say that I don't have the digital photos to share since we don't have on file anything before 1999 but use your imagination and imagine me where Forrest is sitting above.  Of course, when it comes to the movie, I guess the character I would most resemble is Lieutenant Dan (a.k.a., Gary Sinise below with his Lieutenant Dan Band)

(Gary Sinise)

(Not Gary Sinise)

As a matter of fact, that's what a lot of my ACT students used to call me when I first started teaching at Syosset High School.  Since the movie had only come out in 1994, it was still fresh in their minds.  Especially this scene;



Now where was I?  Oh yes, Relativity.  I'm not necessary speaking of the Theory of Relativity (not to be confused with Theory of a Deadman - a Canadian rock band) which as we know was developed by cyclist Albert Einstein while on a cycling jaunt;

(Let's see if I divide how fast I'm going by the number of wheel revolutions.....)

Nope, I'm talking about the feeling we all get when we accomplish something we've been planning for so long and then it happens and you're left with that feeling of "Now what?"  That feeling of wanting to still be relevant.  I've written about it in the past, in fact on numerous occasions. 

And I'm not alone in this feeling.  Recently I was speaking to a long time suporter of Connor's Army who runs a few philanthropic activities of her own.  I won't mention her name her in order to protect her anonymity (but you know who you are) and she was relating how frustrating it feels to do so much work and not reach the goal she had reached for herself.  I certainly do understand.  I had set a goal for myself of raising $50,000 last summer - the goal of trying to send ten campers to Sunrise Day Camp.  We only reached half of the amount when all was said and done.  And I have been feeling so incredibly adrift for the year since we got back because I felt like my family and I worked so hard and sacrificed so much (both financially, physically and emotionally) and now its as if we never did it.  No one remembers what we've done or appreciates any longer what a normal American family did just becuase it was a good thing to do. 

And then there have been the last three weeks at Sunrise Day Camp.  This past week alone have been an amazingly rejuvenating experience as I have been reminded daily of why my family and I gave up our summer, why I risked completely rupturing the disc in my back, why we risked out healthy pedalling in 115+ heat.  I have seen the joy in the faces of the kids that are attending the camp.  I'll never know which kids have been able to have the experience of Sunrise because of my efforts but these past three weeks have been a daily reaffirmation of why my fundraising makes a difference and continues to be relevant.  Moments such as seeing the looks of complete joy when the campers got the chance to experience the carnival with all the bouncy rides during the second week of camp.  I realized that except for the fundraising I and others had done, some of these campers would never experience that kid of joy.  Yes, here on Long Island we get spoiled by all the parties at Pump it Up and other establishments.  But for many of our campers who come from a more urban environment, this was the first time they had ever had the chance to do this sort of thing.  And there will be many more such experiences this summer.

And then there are the things the kids have said to me over the last three weeks.  The first week, five or six campers thanked me for what I did last summer.  Then the second week I was sitting at lunch with some campers from the Leadership group and one of the campers said to me, "I want to thank you becuase you've really inspired me.  I want to do something to make a difference."  As I simultaneously tried to hold back the tears and not choke on my sandwich I had enough blood flow in my brain to be truly thankful for that moment.  Becuase if there was one kid who was brave (and self aware) enough to voice that thought, there are probably more who are having the same thought and just haven't said anything.  And that made me feel definitely relevant.

And then this past week we suffered through and incredibly heat wave.  It wasn't like what my family and I went through in middle America last summer but it was hot and it was stiffling and it was hard on these campers.  And yet, one of the campers came up to me on Thursday and said, "We have drama with you today, I'm so excited!".  Now normally that wouldn't be such a big deal.  Except for the fact that this girl is one that I've known for three years now and who hardly ever cracks a smile. when she sees me.  Yet this time she was smiling and saying how much she was looking forward to doing drama with me!  Now that is certainly relevant and was just the reminder I needed that what I do at Sunrise matters to someone.

So yes, I will still continue to try my best to make a difference in the lives of others, particularly those fighting their individual battles with cancer.  And I will now also get the chance to help make a difference in the lives of my neighbors in Northport as part of the Northport Fire Department.  And I will continue to try to make a difference in trying to help instill the love of drama in just one more young person.  No, I may never again be in the papers (or host the weather for that matter), but that's really not what its about or why I do any of this.  To be relative, I have to act relative and try to make a difference every day.  No matter if it's not good enough for anyone else but me.

And as I voice these thoughts, I'm glad to say I'm back on my bike and training almost every day in order to be in shape for my next assignment as part of the Northport Rescue Bike Squad - you never know when my being able to pedal fast might help someone in need!  And if all goes well, I will start EMT-B classes in September!

So Stay well my friends and I'll see you on the road!

Oh, and for a little dessert after reading all of this about being relative, here is a clip of a song called "All or Nothing" from the band Theory of a Deadman. Hey, they're not bad for a bunch of Canadians (although the road in the video looks strangely familiar);



TTFN