For David

To begin, I could never have imagined that I would be writing these words. I honestly don't know how to begin. You never think there will come a time when one of your siblings, especially one younger than you will pass away. No matter how much distance or time separates you, you always think that they'll always be there. To connect with them all you have to do is pick up the phone or more likely, in this day of technological wonder, facebook or text them. No matter how far away or how much time passes, you never think that your family will ever leave you. You especially don't think there will ever come a time when your little brother won't be there anymore.

David and I didn't get to be together too much over the years. Although I've known about him since I was ten years old, I only got to meet him eleven years ago. But we hit it off as if we'd known each other our whole lives. In a sense we did. From the age of ten I knew I had a baby brother named David, but I knew little about him until I flew down to Knoxville to see my family. We spent a few days getting to know each other, and I knew then that I would be grateful for the rest of my life that I had my little brother back.

I am proud of my little brother. I'm proud of the life he was making for himself and for the way he was good at something he loved to do. Because he loved it, he had the best job in the world. He was a gentle man and funny. He called me a few times when he was on the road and we e-mailed a few more times; and his humor was always there, especially in his e-mails. I never got the funny voice mail messages on my phone that he would always leave for Tamara, but he always knew when my birthday was and I always remembered when his was.

We'll miss his jokes, we'll miss his smile and his laugh, but mostly we'll miss his presence. We just need to imagine that he's only gone on a very long run. As we remember David and remember his smile, we can take comfort in the words that Mary Elizabeth Frye wrote long ago based on the prayers and beliefs of Native Americans:

"Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die."

Goodbye David, we'll see you at the end of the run.